Making the decision to move into a sober living home is an incredibly powerful next-step in the process of recovery from addiction. Whether you’re on the hunt for a fresh start in a supportive environment or looking for a transition out of rehab, sober living offers structure, community and the chance to practice sober living in real time. But here’s the thing – not all sober living homes are the same.
Just like your recovery process is truly unique to you, each sober living home comes with its own set of rules, culture and level of support that it provides its residents. When looking for the right sober living home to match your needs, it’s important to know what you need to ask to find the right space to support your lifestyle, your goals and your healing process. If you’re wondering what to ask before making the move into sober living, you’ve come to the right place. Here are the top questions you need to ask in order to make the right choice for your next chapter of recovery.
Q: What Kind of Structure and Support Does This House Provide?
When entering a sober living home, every house will come with some sort of structure. However, the amount of structure and the type can vary widely from home to home. Some houses operate more like a recovery program, with daily required meetings, curfews and drug-testing with on-site staff. Others may be a bit more loosely structured, focusing on peer accountability and individual responsibility.
When asking about the structure of the home, there are three key areas to hit:
- Daily schedules and routines
- Rules around curfews, guests and phone usage
- Staff availability (ie – is there an in-house manager or on-call support?)
Once you nail this down, you’ll be able to find the right house with the right structure to help you stay on-track yet grounded while simultaneously building your independence.
Q: Is This House Affiliated with a Treatment Center or Fully Independent?
Another important question to ask when considering a sober living home is whether the house is fully independent or associated with a treatment center. Fully independent homes tend to focus more on communal living and peer support, allowing further independence and accountability to lie with the residents. On the other hand, some sober living homes, such as Monarch, that are affiliated with a treatment facility in Sacramento may offer added support like outpatient care, case management, and alumni groups.
Just like the question surrounding the structure of the home, it’s important to decide what path will work best for your unique needs in your recovery. There is no right or wrong answer here – it really depends on where you are in your recovery journey and what you need to stay on track.
Q: What Are the Expectations for Work, Meetings and Daily Responsibilities?
When you decide to become sober, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re putting your life on hold. Rather, you’re rebuilding a new life from the ground up! Many sober living homes encourage or outright require their residents to work, volunteer or go to school in order to maintain living in the home. Others require additional program participation, such as recovery meetings like AA.
To determine what the home requires and whether it suits your needs, you can ask:
- Are residents required to be employed or actively seeking employment?
- Are there any mandatory meetings or activities?
- What are the expected responsibilities that come with living in the home (ie – chores)?
At Monarch’s sober living homes and outpatient facilities in San Francisco and Sacramento, we promote a balance of accountability and personal growth. We encourage our residents to engage in real-world responsibilities while maintaining a strong recovery foundation in order to set them up for the highest levels of success.
Q: What is House Culture Like?
While this question is often overlooked when considering sober living homes, the culture of the home may be one of the most important considerations when choosing where to continue your recovery journey. The house culture can affect everything from your comfort level to your actual success in maintaining sobriety. Some homes are structured, with rigid 12-step programs, while others are more relaxed with open-ended expectations. It’s important to make sure that the sober living home you choose is the right fit, both practically and emotionally.
If you’re trying to feel out the culture of a sober living home, you can ask these questions:
- How many residents live here?
- What’s the average age range of your residents?
- Do people tend to keep to themselves or spend time together?
Another great method of determining house culture is to speak to a resident, either current or former. You can ask them for their insight on the home and get a more accurate idea of the culture that you’d be walking into if you choose to live there.
Q: Is This Home Gender-Specific or Co-Ed?
In shared living environments, the gender dynamics can make a big difference in your recovery process. Some people may feel safer and more supported in gender-specific housing, while others may feel more at ease in co-ed spaces. This is a personal preference that is absolutely worth considering when choosing a sober living home in San Francisco and Sacramento. At Monarch Recovery Centers, we offer gender-specific housing to help our residents feel secure, understood and connected with their peers.
Q: What Are the Costs and What’s Included?
A crucial step in deciding to live in any sober home is to go through the logistics. While these homes are generally more affordable than a traditional rehab program, the costs can still vary from program to program. This is often due to differences in location, amenities and services that are provided.
When determining cost of living in a sober home, you can ask about the following:
- Monthly rent and any deposits
- What’s included with the cost (ie – utilities, meals, transportation)
- Any payment plans or financial assistance options.
In addition to the above, make sure that you understand any house rules around late payments or leaving the program early. By having this information up front, you can avoid any surprises and stresses that can come with financial worries.
Q: How Do Residents Transition Out of the Program?
A final, incredibly important question to ask when considering a sober living home is about how residents transition out and back into society. Moving into a sober living home is an amazing step, but moving out is another. A well-run sober living home should support residents as they prepare for independent living. Ask how long residents typically stay, what the graduation process looks like and what kind of support is offered during this transition phase.
At Monarch, we understand that recovery doesn’t end when you leave a sober living home. That’s why our programs include personalized transition planning – so you can build on the momentum that you’ve created and continue thriving in society on your own.
Your Recovery, Your Future: Find the Right Sober Living Home
At the end of the day, choosing a sober living home is about so much more than four walls and a roof – it’s about finding a space where you feel safe, seen and supported. It’s about beginning the next step in your recovery journey with confidence and clarity. By asking the right questions when looking for a sober living home, you can set yourself up for success and allow you to build confidence to advocate for yourself. After all, choosing a sober living home isn’t just about staying sober – it’s about building a life and a future that you’re proud of.
Whether you’re transitioning from inpatient rehab, continuing care through an outpatient facility, or starting fresh, Monarch Recovery offers a safe, structured, and empowering sober living experience in Sacramento and San Francisco.
